Square -1

Remember how I said yesterday I’d probably be at square one “tomorrow” which is actually now today?

I’d say I’m at square -1!

When we got in the NICU, they said it will be like a roller coaster! For us the roller coaster “looking back” was probably the equivalent of Space Mountain.

Adoption is also described as a roller coaster. But, this ride is the equivalent of a combo of that really tall roller coaster at state line (Las Vegas) and the New York New York coaster in Vegas. I cried before, during, and after both of them….and never again will I get on either of them.

Today it seems, because I found some peace yesterday…satan has attacked me hard. Panic attacks and exhaustion have been what I have dealt with all day. At work my sole job is to help fix people’s problems with medical insurance and usually I dive in as I love finding solutions and helping. Today I’m pretty sure I just took up space. Having days like this don’t happen often and when they do, I usually need to be holed up in my bedroom in bed watching TV.

Please pray for me. Even music hasn’t taken the edge off today.

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3 Replies to “Square -1”

  1. Janelle, Please Let go and let your Father that knows everything about you take care of you. He will bring you peace and joy,make Him more important than anything that’s in your mind. I will pray that His mind will be in you. I love you Janelle, Mom “O”

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