8 More Weeks!

We have 8 weeks left! Last week the Dr. Moved “A’s” due date up by one week…to Thanksgiving Day!!! It could be a Hospital Thanksgiving dinner for us! It’s weird to think that it was just last year’s Thanksgiving when we learned that we could start the Adoption process – the Lord’s plans never cease to amaze amuse me!

I talk frequently with A, and the more and more we chat the more we discover the parallels of our family’s histories, and the similarities in what we want for our children. (She has 2 children she is parenting already). Again – we are amazed and grateful of the grace the Lord has given us and how perfectly He has organized everything. It is so uncanny the way things have worked out for us that it can only be the work of our Lord

A is getting bigger and bigger by the week, and feeling more and more pregnant. She delivered her other 2 children around the same gestational week I delivered our daughter. (That was one of the reasons she picked us, we both delivered micro-preemies. That and she saw the husband’s smile and thought he looked like such a nice guy!). She has never experienced being pregnant at 31 weeks and this is when it starts to get rough and uncomfortable. So we just keep praying for her physical comfort and that she does go full-term as there is that possibility for an early delivery though, the Dr. doesn’t feel she will deliver early this time. She hasn’t changed her mind about her decision, if anything she feels more relieved and sure of it since getting to know us better.

We have started planning and buying the few things we will need immediately. We have all the clothes for the first few weeks, my mom is getting the bassinet ready for us, (my cousin, me, and my brother all used the same one) we have diapers, bottles, a diaper bag, and borrowing a car-seat till we get ours. We are planning to do a meet our little man / baby shower in January!
We cleared out the nursery and will be adding storage to the closet – thank you to my handy husband! We primed the room Saturday, and one of the walls needs another coat of primer as the room had 3 pink walls and one dark brown wall. Sometime this week will finish the priming and get started on painting.

The room is going to be grey and we are going to do this stripe at the top. But, where the red is will be blue, and where the blue is will be grey…20120924-233214.jpg

We have picked the crib bedding… 20120924-233506.jpg

This is the crib we decided on in black…


And…there are a million other things a few more things we need to do before he arrives! I clean when I have excess nervous energy. So things like washing all the drapes, cleaning all the carpets moving furniture and vacuuming behind it. And reorganizing the guest bedroom so that Grammy and Nanna have a nice place to stay and somewhere to put their things. {Have we settled on that name Mom? I think it’s sweeter than just plain Grandma šŸ™‚ }

Anyhow, that’s what’s been going on with us! There are so many other details but, most of the ones that are up in the air will remain that way ’till she delivers and gets released from the hospital.
Please continue to pray for peace, comfort and excitement for us! Pray for A that she is able to have physical comfort the rest of her pregnancy. And pray for peace and comfort for her as well. And lastly she is nervous that everything is going ok with the pregnancy, because she delivered early last time – Her Dr. isn’t doing the greatest job of calming her fears and answering her questions. My heart goes out to her because I understand those fears. Nothing is worse than being pregnant with the big black cloud of “Am I going to deliver early like last time!??” that hangs over your head. We want this baby to go full term, and so does she!

Thank you for the continued support!!! I really can’t fathom what it will feel like to be able to start talking about OUR SON, on HERE!!! On. This.

    Fertility Blog

…that has turned into

    An Adoption Blog

,,,and next on the list…a Mommy Blog!
Whoopee!!!!!! šŸ™‚


Square -1

Remember how I said yesterday I’d probably be at square one “tomorrow” which is actually now today?

I’d say I’m at square -1!

When we got in the NICU, they said it will be like a roller coaster! For us the roller coaster “looking back” was probably the equivalent of Space Mountain.

Adoption is also described as a roller coaster. But, this ride is the equivalent of a combo of that really tall roller coaster at state line (Las Vegas) and the New York New York coaster in Vegas. I cried before, during, and after both of them….and never again will I get on either of them.

Today it seems, because I found some peace yesterday…satan has attacked me hard. Panic attacks and exhaustion have been what I have dealt with all day. At work my sole job is to help fix people’s problems with medical insurance and usually I dive in as I love finding solutions and helping. Today I’m pretty sure I just took up space. Having days like this don’t happen often and when they do, I usually need to be holed up in my bedroom in bed watching TV.

Please pray for me. Even music hasn’t taken the edge off today.

Update 3

Dear family

No other words than to say God is speaking. He is hearing our prayers.

There is a waiting room that’s really quite with a couch that flattens into a single sized bed. So ben and I have been able to sleep.

Taryn is still doing well. Her sat dropped to 75 but she never has liked nighttime. So that doesn’t surprise me.

She is still here. Thank you Lord Jesus.

Thank you for praying please don’t stop.

**Please be in prayer

Dear family.

We are making our way to the hospital now with our family. We have met with her doctors we have gathered in prayer. There is a medication that she needs to get off so she can eat and grow but this med has also been necessary to keep her alive. We are going to stop this med, and God is going to do the rest.

Please pray with us. Pray for this miracle we so desperately want.

Pray for our strength.


Taryn had a stable night, but we received a call early this morning that she needed to be manually bagged for about 30 min.

She has another infection in her lungs that she is being treated for now. It is a yeast infection.

This morning we talked to her nurse and the head neonate Dr at UCLA and Dr Mah the head at Los Robles want to sit down with us @ 1pm and talk.

Taryn is receiving the maximum support that medicine can provide. We are pleading with the Lord for clarity. We have told him that we can not make the decision to end her life. If his will is for her to go home he needs to work above and beyond medicine.

We ask that your prayers be for
1) a miraculous healing.
2) THE LORDS WILL BE DONE. That any decision we make will be God giving us the clarity to make that decision.
3) Strength and peace and hope for Ben and I


Thank you everyone for your prayers. Taryn did awesome today when the put the central line in. They gave her more pain meds, started the procedure and she started saturating in the 90’s! This child is SO darn amazing! Well God is actually the amazing one, but still she handled like it was no big deal. After it was over she started sat-ing in the mid to high 80’s. Ben and I were able to leave the hospital finally feeling like she was feeling a little better. We finally felt a little relief.

This procedure will not get her better but it gives them an access point to administer her meds, so she doesn’t have to 4 IV’s in her body.

What they put in is called a Broviac catheter.

Her is some info and a picture:

Broviac Ā® catheters and HICKMANĀ® catheters are similar to a PICC line. They both allow a soft special type of rubber (silicone) IV catheter to be placed in your child without the need for repeated peripheral IV sticks. A BROVIACĀ® catheter, however, is placed directly into a central vein, usually in the neck, upper chest or groin. The catheter proceeds to a position just above the heart. In general, a BROVIACĀ® catheter is tunneled under the skin and brought out on the chest or thigh away from the site where it enters the vein. Theoretically, this prevents bacteria from gaining access to the central portion of the catheter. Finally, BROVIACĀ® catheters contain a “cuff” which is buried under the skin. Your child’s tissues will grow into this “cuff” and allow the catheter to become more stable, which will reduce the chance of it becoming pulled out.

HICKMANĀ® catheters and BROVIACĀ® catheters are tunneled central venous catheters. The catheter is tunneled under the skin and placed in one of the veins just under the collarbone. The catheter is long enough to reach the large vein that enters the heart. This vein is called the superior vena cava (VEE.na CAVE.uh). The purpose of tunneling the catheter under the skin is to help prevent infection. A small cuff is located around the catheter about one inch inside the place where the tube enters your child’s skin. Skin grows into this cuff and keeps the catheter in place. The cuff also acts as a barrier to infection.
Tunneled catheters have 1, 2, or 3 outside openings. These openings are used for many kinds of medical treatments (fluids, medicines, blood samples, etc.). With a catheter, your child does not need to receive a needle each time one of these procedures must be done.

Some children have IV needs that exceed what a PICC can do. Some may need a catheter for a prolonged period of time – generally greater than 3 months. Others may have a need for extensive blood draws for laboratory tests that may exceed what a PICC can do. Finally, some children may not have large enough peripheral veins to allow for a PICC line. It may be used for chemotherapy, IV medications, IV nutrition, and obtaining blood samples.
If the tunneled catheter is injected (flushed) regularly with an anti-clotting medicine, it does not need to be attached to an IV bag all the time. This allows your child to be mobile. Your child may have the tunneled line only during the hospital stay, or he or she may go home with one.

Unlike a PICC line, BROVIACĀ® catheters are generally placed in an operating room setting. A surgeon will place such a line. Your child will most likely undergo a general anesthetic (completely asleep) when the BROVIACĀ® catheter is inserted. This is important, as there is more pain and discomfort when this catheter is placed. Additionally, the surgeon will need to use X-rays (fluoroscopy) while placing the line – something which can’t be done at the bedside.
In general, a prescription for a pain medication may be given for your child (often Tylenol (acetaminophen) with Codeine elixir or tablets). This prescription pain medication can be used for the first couple of days until the pain subsides. Importantly, do not mix this Tylenol with Codeine with regular Tylenol as this could be harmful to your child). The doctor makes a small opening in the mid-chest area. Another opening is made where the catheter will enter the vein. A tunnel is formed under the skin between the two openings.
The catheter is passed through this tunnel and then gently threaded into the vein. Your child will get a chest X-ray to make sure the catheter is in the proper location.
Small bandage tapes, called Steri-strips are placed over the openings. The catheter may also have a few stitches to hold it in place.


Dear family,

Taryn remained stable through the night and morning.

Taryn is on so many meds and the only access they have been able to gain is through IV. These dont last long and are not the best way to get the life sustaining meds to her. They are going to put in a central line this can be done bedside but is still a surgical procedure. Because she is so very sick doing this could end her life but it is needed to sustain her life as well. I ask that you pray and ask your friends to pray that this procedure is done without complication.

Ben and I Know the Lord has picked us up and is holding us getting us through this. We are standing with him. Please continue to pray for our stamina exhaustion has consumed us.